I won’t comment on Dawn Ostroff personally, but her network  is a downright embarrassment.  The point of The CW was to be really just to merge UPN and The WB using each network’s strongest shows.  I initially would have preferred they just kept The WB branding and simply cherry picked the best of UPN.  (Yes, “Best of UPN” does sound ridiculous.)  But if they were going to take the President of UPN instead of The WB and let her turn the network into this mess, then I’m glad The WB signed off and its legacy wasn’t allowed to be tarnished with this crap.  That said, I still watch a few things on this pseudo-network.  I’m embarrassed to say I have seen every episode of 90210, and found season one to have far more potential than the totally uneven sophomore season.  Perhaps it was more just the hope for an actual story for the old school characters, but I did enjoy some of the newer characters as well.  That was all but gone this season.  Life Unexpected is better than your average CW show but overall has been hit or miss, but I feel it has a lot of growth potential in the vein of 7th Heaven, so CW was actually wise in giving this one a chance to grow.  The most “Unexpected” part of the show is that The CW actually green-lit a show that can’t really be promoted with “OMFG.”  Lastly, Melrose Place. It was actually a good show, and then they axed the dreadful Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and added Heather Locklear.  Melrose Place was a fun, campy, dramatic, well-acted (save for Ashlee) s  that I had a mindless hour of fun watching.  Naturally, it didn’t mesh with The CW’s average viewers mindset (you know…the people who actually use “OMFG” in their actual vocabulary) and it was canceled.

Last year it was all about reboots (90210, Melrose Place) and unintentionally funny dramas that were so poorly done that they were laughable at best (The Beautiful Life: TBL).  Once that fizzled out, it became clear that they’d have to take things in a new direction if they were to ever grow this network into anything resembling a…well, network.  Which brings us to this season which includes a reboot of a ’90s action-drama Le Femme Nikita, this time simply called Nikita.  They are wisely using their one strong new show from last year, Vampire Diaries, to launch it on Thursdays.   Supernatural, meanwhile, shifts to Fridays where it will be paired with the tenth, and final, season of Smallville.  Lastly, we also have a show that looks so  laughably bad that the only reason you may watch it is not because you want to see a drama series but rather watch a show that is so bad that you’ll laugh at it: Hellcats. So the moral of the story here is: CW hasn’t really learned any lessons.  They are shuffling their lineups around a bit, so that’ll do….nothing really.  When it comes to The CW, I don’t care, I don’t get it, I just write about it.  If it affects me (As the cancellation of Melrose Place depressed me) sobeit, but this network is a total joke.  At least I get a good chuckle out of it.

Mondays

8:00 – 90210
9:00 – Gossip Girl

Tuesdays

8:00 – One Tree Hill
9:00 – Life Unexpected

Wednesdays

8:00 – America’s Next Top Model
9:00 – Hellcats

Thursdays

8:00 – Vampire Diaries
9:00 – Nikita

Friday

8:00 – Smallville
9:00 – Supernatural

90210, America’s Next Top Model, Gossip Girl, Supernatural, and Vampire Diaries will all be back next fall, meanwhile the fates of One Tree Hill, Smallville, Life Unexpected, and Melrose Place are less clear.  Smallville and One Tree Hill probably comes down to contracts, whereas Life Unexpected could really go either way.  Ratings were decent out the gate but have dipped, granted reruns on Wednesdays are performing well given its a CW rerun.  This show is still very much on the bubble, with the network likely waiting out a few more weeks of ratings data.  As for Melrose Place, it’s far superior to 90210, but not even Heather Locklear could save this one from ratings doom.   Barring a miraculous uptick in the ratings that show it keeping full retention out of 90210, it has no chance at a renewal.  Here’s the full text from the CW press release about the other shows:

THE CW ANNOUNCES EARLY PICKUPS FOR FIVE SERIES

Freshman Hit “The Vampire Diaries,” “Gossip Girl,” “90210,” “Supernatural” and “America’s Next Top Model” To Return Next Season

February 16, 2010 (Burbank, California) – The CW Network has given early pickups to five series for next season, including four signature dramas and the reality hit AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL. All five shows will return in Fall 2010.

The series receiving early renewals include this season’s breakout hit THE VAMPIRE DIARIES, The CW’s most-watched show (4.6 million viewers) and the network’s number one show among adults 18-34 (2.5/8). THE VAMPIRE DIARIES premiere generated the largest audience in network history for a series debut (5.7 million total viewers). THE VAMPIRE DIARIES has improved The CW’s performance Thursday at 8:00 p.m. by 114% among women 18-34 this season. The network also renewed fan favorite SUPERNATURAL, which will enter its sixth season next year. SUPERNATURAL has one of the most loyal audiences of any show on television and does heroic work in a perennially tough time period. It has improved over last season among women and adults 18-34 (29% and 8%, respectively) this season, a remarkable accomplishment for a fifth-year show.

Also given early pickups for next season are The CW’s Monday night sensation GOSSIP GIRL, which is The CW’s number one show among its target demographic of women 18-34, and Tuesday’s trend-setting drama, 90210, which sees some of TV’s largest percent increases from DVR playback, nearly doubling its women 18-34 live-only ratings once live+7 data is included. Wednesday anchor AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL will also be back for cycles 15 and 16 with superstar Tyra Banks and new groups of aspiring models. TOP MODEL continues to rank second in the competitive Wednesday 8:00 p.m. hour among young women 18-34 (3.4/10).

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Trouble in Paradise

At this point, is it possible for CW to save the reboot?

Last night it got a pathetic .8 in Adults 18-49 and about 1.4 Million viewers. That’s it. Taking a look at last years show PRIVILEGED, a new episode that ran on November 4th (Election Day!) pulled a 1.1 and 2.2 Million viewers (according to Wikipedia). CW dumped PRIVILEGED after an 18 episode run (the same MELROSE PLACE currently has) so shouldn’t the same thing happen to MELROSE? Not so fast.

Heather Locklear is coming back to the show in 2 weeks. How would I know that? Because CW is pasting her face on the stations ‘bug’ on almost every show they air. It’s impossible not to know she is returning the show (at the expense of two other actors being shit canned – and at least one was well-deserved). Will her return suddenly make people tune in to the show? Or will it boost ratings for a week and then taper off into the current state it’s at?

Does anyone care?

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Lookin' good!

After the recent news that her sister, Ashlee, had been cut from the CW drama, the singer blasted the show on her official Twitter page.

“CW catching up on MP,” Simpson tweeted on Sunday night. “Who writes this crap? i have had bad scripts to work with, but this? thank God my sister is amazing and got you some press.”

…Right. Did you forget about DUKES OF HAZZARD, Jessica?

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The CW has also turned that 5 script order into a 5 episode order. MELROSE has picked up a bit in the ratings, and the show is starting to get decent, but its not enough to squeeze that extra 4 more out of it (just yet). It’s possible The CW will cap the Season (Series?) out at 18 episodes like last years now-canceled PRIVILEGED so they can air some of their “reality” shows they picked up for 4-6 episodes.

Three Rivers? Hank? Trauma? Mercy? Dollhouse? Melrose Place?

Sound off in the comments!

HANKS tanks

NBC didn’t show MERCY any, well, mercy

Is there no Hero to save HEROES?

TRAUMA is DOA with viewers

ABC extinguishes the flames for EASTWICK

CASTLE crumbles

CW evicts MELROSE PLACE

THE FORGOTTEN lives up to its name

has decided that repeats of MELROSE PLACE will run in its spot.  MELROSE PLACE which has awed audiences with its amazing numbers (the last TBL had a .5 in the demo, the last MELROSE had a .7)  … no wait.  Look I’d understand moving SMALLVILLE back if the numbers from tonight weren’t great.  I’d even understand running a repeat of VAMPIRE DIARIES the night before a new episode.  That kind of makes sense.  However this is just as stupid (and pointless) as last season.

If those of you remember, last season The CW had PRIVILEGED which was a flop (at .8 average in the demo).  They let it run for 19 episodes, ordering 6 instead of the full back 9.  MELROSE PLACE is following the same path.  6 new scripts (but they haven’t been green lit) have been ordered.  That would make 19.  Last season The CW had another flop after ANTM too.  When they killed it they put reruns of 90210 in its place.  That helped make 90210 more profitable for them based on their arrangement.

We won’t find out until tomorrow if The CW is being stupid with the initial decision or smart.  If SMALLVILLE can pull in its normal 1.5 and 4M viewers I don’t see any uproar.  If SMALLVILLE crashes on Friday you know that Warners will be upset.

After two episodes, The CW has canceled Ashton Kutcher’s scripted drama “The Beautiful Life.”

Wednesday’s episode was seen by just 1 million viewers and generated a 0.5 rating in the adult demo.

Cast and crew found out today when they were filming on episode 7. Looks like 4 episodes will go unaired as the show has been pulled from the schedule.

So which is going to be the first to go – The Beautiful Life or Melrose Place?

You died on The O.C. and now you killed The Beautiful Life. Way to go, Mischa Barton!

Given the fact that The CW ordered 6 additional scripts (not episodes, scripts) I’d place a strong wager that TBL will be the first go (though I believe unless Melrose Place picks up, it will get a solid 18-19 episode order like Privileged last season and end there). But what does CW have to replace it?

On tap is a one hour drama called Life UneXpected (title characters name is Lux…get it?) that is very WBish and might just capture the same audience that tuned in and loved Dawson’s Creek and all the soapy teen dramas from the WB era. They even went as far as to bring back Shiri Appleby (Roswell) and Kerr Smith (Dawson’s Creek). Since Gossip Girl and 90210 story lines tend to cater more towards the rich demographic this really feels like CW going back to their WB roots. Maybe Dawn Ostroff is trying to extend her stay a wee bit longer on the network and not get the boot that is eventually heading her way.

Besides that what does the CW have planned for mid season? A bunch of 30 minute reality-show fodder that is sure to not be a hit for the network. How about Blonde Charity Mafia (pushed back from a summer 2008 premiere since it was soooo good *roll eyes*) which tells the tale of three 20-something women in Washington, D.C. who party and go to fancy parties. Yawn. Thankfully only 6 segments of this stinker were produced so this one won’t stink up the airwaves that long.

Next up is the recently announced Fly Girls which deals with a handful of women who work for Virgin American Airlines as flight attendants. Huh? Who the hell wants to watch that? Have you ever heard any young child say “Mommy, daddy, when I grow up I wanna work for the airlines and hand out peanuts to irate people as they moan about having to sit to close to a crying baby”. CW, what were you thinking?

Finally, and I’m not making this up, CW has already started yet another reality show that deals with “real-life Gossip Girl” Tinsley Mortimer who gust starred last year on, yeah you guessed it, Gossip Girl! She’s a rich and famous gal who designs clothing and other little trinkets. Like Fly Girls, CW has ordered 8, 30 minute segments.

Let me ask you this question faithful readers – what would you rather watch (if you had to – life or death) – a one hour episode of the ratings-starved Melrose Place or two of the above three shows?

If you enjoy Brad’s opinions you might just like his Blu-ray reviews at Blu-Views

While it was a no brainer to order the back 9 for the The Can’t Win Network’s two most viewed scripted shows of their beloved demographic (women 18-34) the order of 6 new scripts of MELROSE episodes is mind boggling.  The decision was tied to the addition of Heather Locklear to the cast.  In the words of one mindless bitch at The CW it’s “guaranteed exposure!,” and while that may be true Dawn is running around making horrible decisions with money that isn’t hers.

Will the government please step in?  I mean seriously, if they think they can save GM they can save The CW.  This kind of decision is right up there with AIG board members taking a luxury vacation on the dime of tax payers who helped buy them out.  Dawn should be held liable just like our President claimed he would the people at AIG.

Am I going too far?  Maybe.  However this is just a step too far.  This isn’t FOX which can renew a above average genre show that has horrible ratings, this is The CW which is renewing a show that got a .8 in the demo last week.  A frickin point eight! The CW doesn’t have the ability to fall back on words like “we’re trying to build stability in our Friday Night lineup,” this is Tuesday night for The CW which historically for The WB and Paramount was one of their top performers.

MELROSE PLACE 2009 is a flop.  It’s not a bad idea, but the new show is nothing compared to the old show and has very little to compare with the original.  Find that hard to believe?  It’s easily summed up with some photos:

Exhibit A:  Cute kids

That’s right they sure look cute.  They’re all what about 20 maybe 21?  They’re all definitely getting carded.  Now look at the original cast:

Exhibit B:  Hot 20 to 30 somethings.

Can you see the difference just from the photos?  MELROSE PLACE wasn’t about teen angst or teen drama it was a full on evening soap starring some really hot young talent in Hollywood.  By hot I only mean physically too.  No offense to the acting skills of the above (where the hell did they all end up?).

Unlike last year’s 90210 which debuted huge, this year the old fans of MELROSE weren’t fooled.  Was it because some had already been suckered in by the horrible 90210 redux?  Perhaps, but a part of me thinks it was also the promotion work done by The CW.  It was obvious from the pictures of the people that this wasn’t your older sister’s cousin’s roomate in college’s mother’s MELROSE PLACE.  This is something different.

The CW found that out too late, and their answer is:  Heather Locklear.  Do I think that will work?  Nope.  You know what would work?

Cast Serinda Swan

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